Mental Health

Reasons Why You Feel Lost And What To Do About It

Reasons Why You Feel Lost And What To Do About It

Do you feel like you don’t really know who you are at this point, or what should you be doing next?

Do find yourself lost whenever you try to have a glimpse of your future?

You may sometimes ask yourself, why is that some people around me have their life all figured out. They know who they are, what their purpose of life is, where they are going, what they should do next, and so on. They have it all figured out while you are totally lost and can’t really find a purpose for your existence.

Before getting all depressed and worthless about yourself, you have to know that people are not always what they seem. Some people can be successful but that doesn’t mean that they have their life all figured out and are all happy and glossy all the time. They may be suffering in a way you know nothing about it.

Even those successful people you see on TV like Robbin Williams, Marilyn Monroe, Freddie Prinze, Avicii, and many others took their own lives because of the great struggles they were going through that none knew anything about.

You have to understand that every one of us had been through the phase of being lost. No one in this life has their life all figured out all the time. So don’t be hard on yourself. You are not alone in this.

Let us look at the reasons why you would feel lost in your life and how you can fix each of these problems.

You didn’t discover your true purpose

The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.

– Mark Twain

When the question, “What is your life purpose?” appears in front of most people, they get into the mode of depression because they don’t really know what they are here for.

There is one thing you need to always keep in mind. Everyone is here for a purpose. Each one of us has a purpose in life. Now it is true that not everyone has figured it out yet, but yes, we all have a purpose.

By saying figured it out, I don’t mean that people found the perfect job or got married to the perfect partner. Although these are great factors to make one feel contented and happy with what they have, figuring out your true purpose is bigger than just being happy with your life.

It is about finding a way in which you can impact this world and the people in it in such a way that you feel fulfilled and satisfied. Living your dream hinged with your values and action plans is what your true purpose is about. It is when you find a deeper meaning to your existence.

WHAT SHOULD I DO INSTEAD?

Here are some questions that I want you to ask yourself. Answer them honestly to help you figure out what your true purpose is. You don’t have to answer them right away. Take your time to deeply think about them.

  • What is your passion in this life?
  • What are you willing to struggle for no matter what happens?
  • What is the one thing that makes you forget to do anything important?

You try to satisfy other people’s expectations

It is common and human nature to wanna be complimented by others. I mean who doesn’t like it when you say something and people are engaged with your opinion and complimenting your way of thinking. They also wait for your next response to a certain situation.

It is true that it acts as a motivation to keep thriving for even more praising. But the disaster happens when you structure your life based on what other people want or expect from you. Your own decision and desire are just not important to you because of what others expect from you.

Think about this for a second. If you base your life on people’s expectations, then feeling lost is just what SHOULD happen, right? You don’t know what you want because you are waiting for others to guide YOUR OWN life.

Definitely, you will feel lost and unable to take any valuable decisions regarding your life because you will be waiting for others to take it for you.

WHAT SHOULD I DO INSTEAD?

  • Stop giving people permission to lead your own life.
  • Fence off anyone who is trying to force their values and core beliefs on how you lead your own life.
  • Don’t compare your life with others.
  • Live your life the way YOU want it.

You focus on rationality rather than connecting with your heart and soul

I know that whenever you have to make a decision about something, at most (if not all) times, you use your brain to rationalize your options and then take the final decision.

Don’t get me wrong. I am not saying that you should not rationalize your options before making a decision. You need to weigh your preferences before determining how you would like to pursue something.

However, you have to evaluate your emotional connection to it before giving the final OK. You have to understand that no matter how great the right decision is, if you are not connected to it, you will always feel lost because your mind and soul are not aligned.

The thing about using only your brain to make a decision is that you are not emotionally connected to your decision. This means that you are spiritually detached from what you are doing. This way, you will always stay unhappy and lost because you will always feel like it is not what you should be doing right now.

WHAT SHOULD I DO INSTEAD?

  • Whenever you think about what you want to do next in your life, write down all the things that you are passionate about.
  • And then, scratch off the things that you can not do at the moment.
  • After that, focus on the best option from all the ones that you are capable of doing at this moment.

You surround yourself with toxic people

One thing we have to agree on is that people around us influence us one way or another. Positive people inspire us and negative people magnify the faults in ourselves and our lives.

You may think that your circle has no negative effect on you because of how happy you feel around them. Yes, your friends (or your circle in general) can make you happy while having fun with them, but that doesn’t mean that they are not toxic.

Toxic friends are the ones who are constantly whining and venting about everything around them. They criticize and gossip about everything and everyone. These kinds of people can be fun to be around but they are poisonous to your mind and heart. They sow in you all kinds of negativity, doubts, fears, and diminish your self-esteem with time.

These kinds of people are partially responsible for making you feel lost in your life because whenever you want to grow, they just pull you down by making you believe that it is not worth doing a challenging task to help you grow. In most cases, it is because they don’t have the guts to do it.

We all have such people in our lives, but the difference is that successful people never lend ears to these kinda people. They let them stay away from their life as much as they can.

WHAT SHOULD I DO INSTEAD?

Try to remove toxic people from your life. Even if you find yourself forced to have encounters with these people, try to reflect positivity on their negative actions.

This way, two things can happen: either they start to feel uncomfortable or an outcast around you and later decide you are not the kind of person they wanna hang around with. Or, they start to change their perspective and view life the way you do. Either way, you have nothing to lose, but in the latter option, they have something to gain.

You have a negative self-perspective

Not only can your friends have a toxic effect on you. Your mind can do that too. This happens when all the thoughts about yourself are negative thoughts.

There are moments in our life where frustration and loss of interest take over us. But that is all it should be…moments. By driving your mind and soul to negativity, you are killing your thoughts on practicing the things you are passionate about.

Self-love is the catalyst for leading a better lifestyle. The amount of love and respect you should give yourself is greater than you can ever imagine.

Think of how much you have survived until today. No one didn’t go through certain rough patches but here you are, sane and complete. You just need to love yourself more so you can work on yourself and get yourself out of the feeling of being lost.

WHAT SHOULD I DO INSTEAD?

  • Start journaling your thoughts to inspire yourself.
  • Look for what interests you and start doing it.
  • Forgive your mistakes because everyone makes mistakes. Just learn from them.
  • Say ‘No’ to others if it is not what you want to do. Remember, you should be happy doing things for others, not forced to do them.

You are holding on to implanted/inherited fears.

Don’t worry. Again, you are not the only one who has biases about how you would feel about a certain situation based on what you have gone through in the past with similar situations.

Most people have sentences like “I am a failure,” “I will never succeed because nothing works for me,” ingrained in their mind that it makes it sound like a fact rather than a judgment to them. It may seem so real when they say it that it becomes a fixed mentality.

Nothing in this life can work out if you didn’t take the risk to make it work. The only way you can risk something is by believing that there is no guarantee it will work, but either way, you are willing to try regardless of your fear towards the outcome.

Maybe you were told it won’t work but maybe it will. You will never know until you try. The main thing is to be ready for any outcome by setting your expectations for both possibilities: it will work or it won’t.

Either way, you are going to let go of your fear and bias. With this, you will no longer find a reason to feel lost about what you want and pursue it like there is no reason not to.

WHAT SHOULD I DO INSTEAD?

  • Live the kind of life you want without having any unrealistic fear and bias.
  • Come out of your comfort zone and try to accept challenges that are related to your journey to achieve your purpose in life.
  • Believe everything you want is worth trying without thinking about anything else.

Related Post: How To Convince Yourself That Life Will Get Better

You try to control everything around you

This reason can somehow be related to the previous point about sticking to your comfort zone to avoid ingrained fears and biases you live with. However, the act of trying to control everything around you has more to do with uncertainty and perfection.

Most of us want the best outcome we can ever get. While we know that we can not really control everything around us, we still choose to want the perfect outcome. This can be responsible for us procrastinating in whatever we want to do so we can do it when we can control it.

You have to know that life has a natural flow. You can’t control everything in it or know about everything it is willing to offer. You just have to live your life trying to control what you can and letting go of feeling the urgency to control everything around you.

WHAT I SHOULD DO INSTEAD?

  • Believe that perfection is a myth so don’t try to make things perfect.
  • Stop urging yourself to control the things that are out of your hands and try to control your life in aspects that you actually can.

You don’t spend enough time with nature

Do you have any idea the serenity and clarity you can get when you spend some time alone with nature? It truly is a spectacular feeling. It boosts your level of relaxation and optimism towards life. Trust me, you will naturally feel happy.

Nature has its way to make you feel relaxed and reconnect you to yourself. By having to spend some time in nature, you can give yourself the chance to deepen your thoughts, think about the different events happening in your life, and how it is affecting you. This will help you find yourself and look into the confusion and feeling of being lost in your life.

When I say explore nature, it doesn’t mean that you need to go camping or visit the woods to see what nature looks like. While going up a hill/mountain and enjoying the view from up there is spectacular, it is not always possible to go visit a mountain top. There are other simple places to enjoy nature.

WHAT SHOULD I DO INSTEAD?

  • Go to places like a park close to your area or your roof and enjoy what you see.
  • Explore the view of nature for at least 15-20 mins every other day. If it is not possible, then you can make it once a week to declutter your thoughts.

Final Thoughts

The world around us has so many going on in it that it makes us lose ourselves without even noticing. You shouldn’t give in to the feeling of being lost because you can always grow from it.

Always remember that

You are more than you think you are and even more than you think you can ever be. – Reem Shams.



Thank you for reading till the end πŸ™‚

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Do you feel lost and unable to figure out your purpose? Feel free to share which of the above reasons implies to you in the comments below.


Reasons Why You Feel Lost And What To Do About It

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6 thoughts on “Reasons Why You Feel Lost And What To Do About It”

  1. Fantastic blog post!!! I think in life is important to be happy, no matter what other think is right for us. When I was a teen my mum kept telling me that I had to study maths because I was good at it but the only thing I wanted to do was writing. I pleased her and went to Scientific liceum, I hated it, every single day was a nightmare. In the end I changed school and everything got better. Never please the other, we have to do what makes us happy.

    Liked by 1 person

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